Minimalist: The Real Story of Prince Charming.

"Take the money, leave the Prince" - Cinderella, a minimalist feminist.

“Take the money, leave the Prince” – Cinderella, minimalist feminist.

Cinders, the minimalist

Was a mere opportunist.

This girl had already got the gist:

Get money. Disappear in mist.

 

When this story first began

Prince Charming was a fine young man,

But after Cindy R he ran –

And let his life go down the pan.

 

Queen Mother warned of many woes:

« Miss Cinderella picks her nose!

She wears black laddered panty hose,

And on her legs a forest grows! »

 

But Charming yearned to have a whirl

With this obnoxious, haughty girl…

Whilst Cinderella dreamed of pearls

To tangle in her fake blonde curls.

 

He was rich and hot to trot,

So Cinderella hatched a plot

To snare her prince and grab the lot.

She said « yes » quick, and tied the knot.

 

Bright and early the next morning,

Cinders woke as light was dawning.

Scratching her armpits and yawning,

She hid beneath the palace awning.

 

« Time for some fun! » young Cindy said

When Charming staggered out of bed.

Bang! bang! bang! She shot him dead…

and on the floor poor Charming bled.

 

Jumping up and down with glee,

Cindy grabbed the cash to flee.

« Yippee-doo! It’s clear to see

That where there’s muck, there’s brass – for me! »

 

Cindy said, « I have to say

A life of crime does seem to pay.

Hip-hip hurray! Kaloo! Kalay!

I think I’ll do this every day ».

 

This post was inspired by this week’s photo challenge, “Minimalist”. 

Advertisements

40 thoughts on “Minimalist: The Real Story of Prince Charming.

  1. oooo – I knew it was going to end badly when I spied the gun in Cinder’s hand.

    … and here I thought she was a gentle, loving young girl. Obviously I’m a poor judge of character!! 🙂

  2. Oh, my, MM. Every time I think I’ve found my favourite post of yours, you prove me wrong. This is ‘da bomb’. Love it. And the Playmobil props? Absolutely brilliant. Xxx

    • I’m sure that half of the Fairy Tales gang can be rewritten much more interesting destinies. I mean come on, did Cindy really just aspire to being saved by a prince? Sad, really. I love Shrek for that (get that cinema culture vulture). This is more my style of Princess:

  3. Not sure your version will make Panto this year! Cinders with hairy legs, picking her nose. Love it, love it. xxx

  4. This is hilarious! But haven’t you become quite the cynical one? Tat said, in Cinderella’s defence, I’d say that it is tough to be a woman…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s